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Very Disappointed…

What a sleepless night, rolling on the bed recalling the scene, I just can’t fall asleep…

A serious disappointment, something that I saw… Now I know why people say gambling can be bad to relationships between people…

When I gamble, my main intention is just to play the game, and don’t like to win too much money, especially from family and friends…

When I was winning, then I started losing next because this someone was playing on behalf of one of the players… Expected, because this someone is known to be LUCKY and ALWAYS winning without fail… I didn’t mind, because I was just losing money that I won earlier… Until I lost all my winnings and started losing, I decided to stop playing, but I was told to play for the last round…

So my turn to ask this someone to play on my behalf… But, this suggestion was being rejected, saying it’s NOT FAIR… I was thinking to myself, when he was winning for you then it’s fair, winning for me then it’s not fair? I felt hurt looking into that face, a face that showed me selfishness, that had an intention to win me… It shows me that they were just afraid that this someone would win their money for me…

And also it’s not a good idea to play with people who will gang up to minimise losses. Sometimes too smart in counting is not good. I have always wanted to believe that my family and friends wouldn’t do things like that, and I even had argument with people who told me that they would. I tried to protect them, I chose to believe in them. Or rather I would say, I chose to close one eye not to see it, because I wanted to keep these players with me and also the relationship. But when I was told “Of course I will win yours, because winning her money is also my money”… Now, this is no longer GAME that I initially thought… It’s now about WINNING MONEY… So, I taught myself no matter what, the main point is to WIN MONEY!! So, I won some with anger in it together with the WINNING MONEY intention…

But today, when I thought that I shouldn’t be like that, so I turned back to the old me… Win for the fun and then lose back the winnings… But, it happened again, the scene showed that people didn’t think like how I thought…

Again…

I am not sure if I should be like them, win win win in mind… I don’t mind if I lose because I am a shit player or I have bad lucks… But if I lose because I got cheated, by family and friends… That’s something that I don’t understand…

Anyway, hopefully I feel better after this and can fall asleep soon…

5 replies on “Very Disappointed…”

loklok, you dont talk so much!! shudup!!

johnny, HELLO!! welcome!! erm… anyway, it’s true, but the above entry is now SOLVED and CLOSED as per MISUNDERSTANDING… =P

Don’t gamble in the first place. It will always cause mis-understandings, whether or not you have resolved the issues involved or not. There will be bad blood no matter how nice you try to be.

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