Author: eRiCCa

KEN had been popping out for so many times today…

let’s start from… ok, i went to sleep at 1am last night *or this morning* then suddenly woke up from sleep at 3am… as usual i checked my sms and msn and ym… then i saw this someone msged me… so went on talking to him lor… but then it went to a very confusing discussion –> i saw you, i thought you saw me, i didnt see you, i wasnt pissed, i thought you were pissed… damn 38 arguing during midnight… somemore mid of the sleep somemore… aiseh… it went on and on until… 6am, i got ready to go to college edi… so… i only slept for 2 hours!!

then i was like a fisherGIRL in the class man!! the eyes kept closing, it didnt work though even i kept moving here and there, pinching myself, sending sms, pulling my hair… trying to make myself awake… arrggghhh… finally, i was awake for 5mins as the girl behind me accidentally kicked my back while i was ALMOST asleep… wahlao, this kick really woke me up man!! but it only lasted for 5mins… *shiatz* i quickly went to the cafeteria to get myself a can of nescafe and then asked KEN to fetch me to his house for me to sleep for 20mins during the break and also i wanted to charge my phone…

who knows this idiot was watching 恶魔在身边… yea lar, i watched before, but then last episode damn touching weik… so i also watched… then the stupid ken also watched me crying… *dengz* then when i looked at the time… OMG, i was already late for half an hour, aiskz, rushed there lor, opened the door then i saw… eeeeeeeeeeeeee… a bunch of strangers!! arrrgghh~~ my class moved to somewhere else dont know where edi and i was late… damn it!! the lecturer must be giving out TIPS for the test one!! *sadz* so what to do… KEN came to fetch me again… HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA~~

i was there studying for the test… until i got no time to go break with wheimeng, and so he kept telling me that he lost the chance to go out with a LENGLUI because of me!!! he said that he rejected her date because of me wor… hey smart people, do you think that this is trustable? *i doubt* and then KEN fetched me *he came along too* to have lunch with sheryl, brian and arthur the lala… *sheryl very the cute ooorrrhh* =)

then rushed back to check my test venue… yea, i didnt know about it… aiskzzz… then happily went for the test and happily be prepared to go home… but then… i found something… why the car like… DEAD edi one, no response AT ALL MAN!! then only i realised that i left the lights on since morning until 6pm… fuwah… *applause* what to do again… KEN LOR!! hahahaha… ken came over for the rescue… but then, it didnt work… aiskzzzz, i was damn worried, i knew that i was gonna get screwed by dad soon, how i wished that i need not to call dad… but but but… then i cried… *scared* dad came, was trying to hide myself, trying not to talk… *yeay* finally done, didnt kena scolding… KEKKEKEKE… then dad following me from behind… wahlao… damn stressed weik!! first time lar dad tailing me… i almost went out of control man… so scary… i almost banged the car in front of me while i kept looking at my dad behind… *iiissshhh* scarynyer~~~

finally got home safely… had around half an hour rest… then phone rang edi… Wing asked to go out for a drink… i said i damn tired… but then he said a while only… so went out again… reached home at 10+pm… not as late, but it’s damn tiring lar weik~~ only had 2 hours sleep… *ouch*

anyway, i need to thank KEN for temaning me for the whole day although he was sick and still fetching me from college, to college, from college, to college… then somemore gotta help me with the car’s battery… and also we were fighting with the money like those aunties fighting to pay like that… he reloaded my phone credits but didnt want back the money… in the end i managed to leave the money in his car… *victory* =P

ehehhee… basically, i have nothing to update for today… but i am just here to announce that i am fine… =) dont worry about me oorhhh… *as if someone is worried*

wow… great news i got from this friend… so happened that he knows WJ… and he was happily telling me that WJ actually has a REAL GF and also some other girls… what a joke man… my mind suddenly went blind, really surprised…

i took my friend’s phone to sms him… told him that i am tired of being a fool, but it’s my fault of willing to be fooled… for 3 years… but then he said it’s not 3 years because he said i was happily enjoying while i was in aust… and he asked me what i expect actually… i told him that i didnt expect him to lie, i thought that he would at least mean 50% of his words, but he didnt… and he said that i was happily with others too… ok, i was, but i didnt lie… i told him everything in fact… and of course i also know that he is playful and i know that he has many girls, but who cares, i am playful and i have many guys too… as long as… we know the limit and the most important thing is… i am responsible, i am not attached to anyone… i thought he is the same too… but in fact… he has a gf… basically, this is the part that i am superly disappointed at…

i actually told him that… thanks for the happiness as well as sadness… and also disappointments, they are seriously priceless… and also asked him not to worry about the chocs and the tee, they are the first and last gifts from me…

no… i didnt cry… very surprisingly, i was shocked too… but i could feel the pain in me… cracking pain… but i couldnt cry… how i wish that i could cry… it should be better i think… probably, i already dont know how to cry for him anymore…

[updated]
2 mins after i published this entry… and i knew that miracle wont happen… yes, i already started to cry…

well… i am now declaring a NOMORE to this 3 years of bullshits…

i dont understand why i need to beg one to collect his present from me… and even sent it over to his doorstep… then even gotta force him to try them on and see whether it fits or not… i even asked him whether he wanted me to ta pao for him or not since he told me that he was hungry… i spent my 3 hours in his room watching tv… well, it’s actually ok where i kinda enjoy it as he was by my side…

but… i could sense that he wanted me to leave… he kept asking me when my friends coming to pick me up… alright, so i got esmund to pick me up… and so, i requested him to accompany me to walk out to the guard house as i was afraid of dark and also walking alone… but he told me that he has never walked to the guard house before in his life and he didnt wanna walk too… i was damn angry… i just walked away… till i got into the car, i just couldnt help myself… i cried… i cried for this end of this 3 years… i immediately deleted ALL MESSAGES from my phone, included those i saved since year 2004… and also of coz i deleted his numbers too…

later, he sent an sms to thank for the choc and the tee… i laughed… i seriously laughed… i would prefer him to thank me for treating him nice, for pampering him… but not the things i bought… he just doesnt know how to appreciate it, and not knowing how lucky he is…

by the way, it’s a good thing though… finally, it’s time… for me to love myself more… and finally i can rest my mind for quite sometime… i need to be alone…

p/s: title edited to SAMPAH… yes… i am a sampah~~ =P and now waiting to be recycled… HAHAHAHAHHAAH~

weeeeheeee~~ ehhehehe… was once impressed with a specky me long time ago… bugged mom to get me a pair of specs… but mom didnt want to… *aiskzzz*

but then… NVM LAR!! now i am a big girl already!! i have my own money!! i can buy myself!! but then… i didnt buy… i TOOK den’s specs instead… ekekekekekek… *smart girl* well, people commented that i look more matured, more polite, more professional, even mayvis said i look like a TEACHER… while den said i look like a TEACHER IN JAPANESE AV… *WTF*

[please excuse the ugly complexion, without make up is like this one lar]

damn the flash… looks like ghost only…

good girlnyer… *nomore lala*

i am a teacher… call me Ms. Chin… *ROFL*

so this is the AV look, you mean?

weeeeeeheeee~~~ i always believe that one person wont be so damn unlucky for so long one… kekekekekek… and yes, i think i already gone through the WORST days… so now, my luck is BACK!! kekekekekekekek~~~ i played monopoly again last night… and i didnt lose until very cham ooorrhh… in fact, i seldom go to jail oooorhhh~~~ *grinz*

erm… went to this mamak with family… while i ordered a TEH TARIK, but my mom and brothers ordred ABC… this waiter there damn kurang ajar… i already said i wanted a teh tarik but then he kept asking me ‘ABC?’ ma de!!!!! damn dulan siaoz, then i asked him to ‘SHHHHHHHHH’ and i repeated again with ‘T-E-H T-A-R-I-K’… then he somemore ‘ABC lar’ then i raised up my arm ALMOST wanna whack him edi… damn geram~~~~!!

then during night time… went to petaling street… yoohooo~~ damn long didnt go there edi… damn happening… but damn boring also… hahahahahahah~~

anyway, i am still PISSED!! at an IDIOT!!

finally, he is now gone forever… the saddest day afterall… rest in peace… and also thankx people for the concern =)

*****************

well, was kinda happy and been waiting for something to happen TONIGHT… as someone said… but then… an idiot is forever an idiot, a liar is forever a liar… he said i didnt reply his message while i said i didnt receive his message… it’s really tired of arguing all the time… the feeling is not good at all… i dont know what’s wrong with our PHONES… his phone tends to ignore my messages most of the time… while mine also doesnt like his messages… i guess, we are not meant to contact each other… shall i let you gone forever as well…

[updated]
i was able to get him, and he responded… but then he asked me to wait for him to finish his bowling games at 430am just to accompany him to ta pao A&W? while i left my mamak session with friends at 330am? *ARGHHHH* i would say that… not sincere at all!! nah, i wasnt that dumb to do so, i went home instead… =)

it’s the 2nd night of the funeral… tonight… sorry to say that, but i must say… it’s a fun night… hahahahaha… we laughed a lot… those SI FUs damn joker, and also there was this session where we gotta pick up coins that hiding in the sand… everyone was like fighting for it, kinda fun… and nobody was crying though… guess everyone already accepted the fact…

and to me, it’s my SMS night… hahahahah… been sms-ing all night long… i think… almost sent out 100 smses? hahahaha, so that the time flies faster, same to my credits… HAHHAHHAHA~

anyway, time to rest… damn freaking tired man these few days… tomorrow last edi…

well, 7th january 2006, at around 1am… finally, my uncle had decided to leave this world… peacefully… after one of the uncles visited him… i guess, he had been waiting for this uncle to be back from outstation to see him, as they were kinda close to each other… as usual, he was a loner, even till the moment he left… he left when there was nobody beside him… when the wives rushed there, his body already covered with white cloth…

hopefully that he is now understand how to love himself and his family more… and be a better person next life… till then… rest in peace…

my this elder uncle already passed away because of high blood pressure… my another younger uncle went through a heart operation 4 months ago *HERE* also due to the same problem… that they were all having the same mind… which is… eating is happy, eating delicious food is the happiest moment in life… doctors are idiots… what’s death? die mar die lar…

my dad USED TO be like them too, ah yea, this proves that they are one same family… but then, my dad has changed… probably he has seen too much of these… and also my mom’s mumbling too much… he is now a BETTER MAN… he knows how to control his diet, he knows when to take medicine, he knows he has a family, he knows his responsibility, he knows he has to be healthy… of coz i hope that he will be healthy forever… dont make us worry please…

*****************

oh yea, although a bit inappropraite to do this in this entry… still… i have to do so… HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY IDIOT EX, ESMUND!! damn idiotic called me yesterday asking me to sing him a song… i went like WTF… then only i noticed… today is his birthday… too bad lar, no pressie for you but i already given you the best pressie ever –> my absence! *bluek* wishing you… not gonna have any problem with your deardear anymore, so that i am free from trouble… =P

hmmm… mom told us to ready white t-shirt and jeans… get prepared… even my uncle’s wife already started to build those roof and all… even those Na Mo Lou *i dont know what’s in english* already standing by as well… the heartbeats still maintained at 10, 11, 10, 11… it seems like… he still has SOMETHING that he wanna do… so they thought of his daughters… they brought his daughters to him…

last night, one of his friends brought a Si Fu to see him thought of using some POWER to cure him… but… when the Si Fu looked at him, he didnt wanna help… even doctors said so… there is no point to go for operation as well… now, just let him live for how long he wants…

well… that’s all i have now… arrrrggghhhh… dont know how to imagine what’s gonna happen soon…